July 2011
5 posts
Europe in Three Minutes or Less # 14 - How to Stay...
An Ewok in Las Vegas
At the late, great “Star Trek: The Experience” at the Hilton.
2 tags
Europe in Three Minutes or Less # 13 - How to...
The rules are clearly posted for all to see: absolutely no filming within the museum. Undaunted, I decided to see how many of Van Gogh’s paintings I could capture before getting yelled at or kicked out. The results? Watch and find out!
A Statue With Its Head Hung Low
London, 2007.
The Decision to Flee Came...Slowly
Four years ago, I spent a long weekend in Amsterdam. It was an awful experience. I arrived in the city after a sleepless night spent on a train from Rome to Paris. I got lost on the way to my hotel, wound up in the middle of nowhere and had to beg a tram driver for help. When I did find the place, a (literally) hunchbacked clerk in Rembrandt Square took advantage of my weariness and attempted to...
June 2011
4 posts
Graffiti = encouraged in the Netherlands?
“M” found these stencils for sale at V & D, a large department store in Leiden, and sent me this snapshot. I think it goes without saying that this sort of thing would never fly in the states.
Europe in Three Minutes or Less # 12: The Crazy,...
This game, featured during an exhibit at Mediamatic in Amsterdam, is called “Galspanic.” It’s an arcade title that, for obvious reasons, was never released in the United States. The goal is to maneuverer a florescent disc around a grid and form loops, revealing a picture of a nude woman underneath. Occasionally, a very odd, penis-shaped king appears out of nowhere to hyperventilate...
1 tag
A Polisher of Lamps
Istanbul, 2011
1 tag
Waiting for Meloy
Back in March, my gal-pal “M” and I caught The Decemberists at Paradiso in Amsterdam. It’s an amazing music venue, probably my favorite on the planet, housed inside an old church.
Stained glass windows still hang over the stage, the acoustics are great and the vibe in there can described as some combination of the phrases “a warm blankie blessed by Jesus himself” and...
May 2011
10 posts
Feeding the Trolls
Are you looking for a quick, easy way to drive yourself absolutely insane? Well, speaking from experience, I can tell you that trying to create a Wikipedia article for a radio show with questionable notability is one way to place your brain on a non-stop flight to Crazy-Topia.
Cort and Fatboy is a program I’ve been listening to over the course of the past few years. Despite the absolutely...
1 tag
Europe in Three Minutes or Less # 11: Smoke Pong
The 11th entry in the series takes a look at “Smoke Pong,” a video game that was featured in an art exhibit in Amsterdam last winter.
An Anti-Scientology Protest
San Francisco, 2008.
2 tags
An Interview With Hutch Harris of The Thermals
Back in March, I had the good fortune to interview Hutch Harris of The Thermals for a nifty English magazine in the Netherlands called Unfold. Released biweekly, each issue “unfolds” to reveal a poster as the reader makes their way through the magazine. The experience is sort of like opening a present or dissecting a paper crane (but in a good way…uh, that doesn’t make sense, does it?). Of...
A "Claw-Machine" Filled With French Bread Instead...
Tokyo, Japan. 2004.
1 tag
A Blast From the Past
A friend of mine recently spent some time in Las Vegas. She returned and lamented what the place has become. A quick paraphrasing of her comments. “There wasn’t a sign of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson to be found anywhere.”
I’ve never been a fan of Vegas, or at least Vegas-proper. You can keep all those glitzy casinos on the strip. To me, they’re all exactly the same....
2 tags
April 2011
8 posts
2 tags
How NOT to Get Kicked Out of the Netherlands
Here’s a free piece of advice: if you ever plan to spend more than ninety days in the Schengen Area of continental Europe, make sure your visa situation is squared away.
I didn’t do this so learn by my example…if you haven’t already. If you’re an expat reading these words in the Netherlands, you’re probably there on a student visa or you’ve been sponsored by an employer or your...
2 tags
1 tag
WatchOne more from the Easter files….
The Stuff of Cadbury Egg-Fueled Nightmares
My parents’ dog with the Easter Bunny or a scene from David Lynch’s new movie? Anybody care to take a guess?
Ok, I’ll level with you. It’s the pooch. This photo was taken at Lexi Dog’s Boutique & Social Club (no, seriously, that’s what it’s called) in Portland, OR. I’m not entirely sure what goes on at a social club for dogs. I imagine...
A New Face for an Old Blog
Once upon a time, I was the author of something called Another Portland Blog. Slowly but surely, that blog drifted away from its original theme. The focus shifted from Portland, Oregon to my travels abroad. It finally became obvious that I should toss in the towel and start over again.
Blogger.com served me well over the years. I started doing all of this waaaay back in October of 2003. Alas,...
March 2011
6 posts
2 tags
Life in the Twike Lane
I met Paul a while back. You know the term “an American original”? Well, Paul’s a Netherlands original.
After a dinner of fish and homemade fries at the flat he shares with his fiancée in Amsterdam, he presented my gal-pal Marie and I with a crystal candy dish filled with dried worms. They came in two flavors “original” and “nacho” and looked like the...
1 tag
2 tags
Trapped at the Bunny Ranch part 3: Escape from the...
I had come to the Bunny Ranch, chatted with a prostitute and, despite the awkwardness, I had gotten what I came for: a dippy story for friends and the blog. But what was I doing in another bedroom with another prostitute? This was not my beautiful mid-size rental car. This was not Jane, the beautiful working girl who happily chatted with me about her life and the industry. I asked myself: how did...
February 2011
12 posts
2 tags
Insert Caption Here?
The father of my friend Cory once worked for the PPD. That’s him on the right. This photo was taken sometime in the ’70s. The gent in the socks? A rather daring public masturbater who was caught in the act on what was, hopefully for him, a warm day in downtown Portland.
Cory’s mother recently found this shot in her attic. It’s definitely...
2 tags
Jerkwards at Live Shows: an International Epidemic
I’ve been there before and so have you, no doubt. You’re at a show, perhaps even up front a few feet from the band, when two people next to you decide to hold a conversation. They’re completely oblivious to the music and, despite the fact that they’re shouting to be heard, are behaving as if they’re passing time in a cafe. Their motivations are unknown and their...
2 tags
Delorean in Haarlem
Portland band Dolorean is currently on their first European tour. I managed to catch their set at a club in Haarlem last Thursday.
No, that’s not a typo. The name of the city is, indeed, “Haarlem,” or so I’m told.
It was a solid set and the crowd, with the exception of two Dutch guys who would not shut-up during the acoustic numbers, was supportive. My friend Marie...
1 tag
Rebuild the Wall
I was in the eighth grade when I first heard about Pink Floyd. One afternoon in algebra class, I was sitting around with a group of my fellow students talking about music. At the time, I was big into Guns n’ Roses and Z100. One kid mentioned the band and suggested that I give Dark Side of the Moon a shot. “Your parents will have a copy in their record collection. I guarantee it.”...
In Search of the Holy Grail (of Beer)
Recently, I had the good fortune to land a pretty fantastic freelance gig. The assignment: go to Antwerp and find out what beers are currently popular among Belgians. Along with my friend Marie, I spent a weekend in the city touring pubs and drinking some of the finest brews in the world.
I consider the experience a chance of a lifetime. Here’s the...
1 tag
Trapped at the Bunny Ranch Part 2: Interview With...
I turned off Highway 50 and up the steep, winding road that leads to the Bunny Ranch around 5 o’clock. A inauspicious, homemade sign leads the way; the sort of marker you’d typically see pointing towards a car wash fundraiser for a local high school marching band. It’s a lonely, gravel road a few hours before sunset on a Friday. Nothing but overgrown patches of brown grass...
January 2011
1 post
4 tags
Trapped at the Bunny Ranch Part 1
I’m going to tell you a story about my trip to a brothel in Nevada back in September. I feel obliged to include a disclaimer here at the beginning of this tale. Because I am uptight and cheap, I would never actually pay to have sex with a “professional.” Furthermore, I find prostitution “icky.” Hoping in the sack with a total stranger, especially one that has several...